i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
