We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
