Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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