I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize