I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize