Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
