Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize