OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize