are you so shy because you have an std?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
soo... how was my night?
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize