the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
