oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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