At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
i think im in europe. pls send help
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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