Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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