i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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