You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
