brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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