If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
