Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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