You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
