i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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