He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
