Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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