Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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