How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
