First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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