I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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