I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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