Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
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