last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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