We're facebook friends in real life
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
We are all done wearing pants today
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
