You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
