You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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