i don't plan on having that self control this summer
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
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