Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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