i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
