Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
