Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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