Me. At least after what I've been through.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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