Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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