Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize