You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Randomize
