So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
