you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
operation harelip BJ is a go
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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