yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
