Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
