I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
