I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Pappa wants mamma naked
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
