I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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