She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
