yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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